


Unbeknownst to Them

by Honorable_mention



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Comedian Richie Tozier, Domestic Fluff, Eddie’s coworkers - Freeform, Everybody Lives, Famous Richie Tozier, Fix-It, Fluff, Gay Eddie Kaspbrak, Gay Richie Tozier, M/M, Married Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, coming-out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-25
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:00:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24904207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Honorable_mention/pseuds/Honorable_mention
Summary: In which Eddie could have sworn he told his coworkers he’s dating Richie Tozier.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Patricia Blum Uris/Stanley Uris
Comments: 12
Kudos: 423





	Unbeknownst to Them

Eddie Kaspbrak didn’t hate his job. He just hated the people he worked with. Eddie could sit at his desk for hours, pouring over data and making visual representations for presentations he would do later that week, but sit him next to his coworker and he suddenly began questioning his career choices.

“You would not believe how hot she was, man,” Max said as he leaned against the break room wall. “I swear, she had movie star tits.” Max was a thoroughly average man with short brown hair, a charismatic smile, and the maturity of a twelve year old.

“Sure, you can go on one date with some no-name Tinder lady,” so-and-so replied, “but I once slept with Taylor Swift. At least, I’m pretty sure it was her.” Eddie had never bothered to learn so-and-so’s name. As soon as they parted ways back to their respective offices, Eddie wasn’t sure he’d even be able to describe the man’s hair color.

“We all know you didn’t sleep with Taylor Swift, dude. Honestly, it’s kinda sad how often you bring it up.” Max sipped his coffee. “Like, hook up with an actual chick and I’ll be impressed, but I doubt that would ever happen.”

“Oh come on! I sleep with plenty of chicks!”

“Just ask Teddie what he thinks, I’m sure he can see what a virgin you are, man,” Max said, pointing to Eddie.

“My name’s Eddie, and I’m not getting involved with this.” Eddie finished his lunch and started to walk back to his desk. Max and So-and-so were still bickering and shoving each other in the break room. 

Eddie didn’t hate his job, he promised himself, just the people in it.

—

Eddie opened the apartment door to the smell of warm spices. They hung thick in the air, comforting and sweet.

“Eds! You’re finally home! I was worried the paneer was going to get cold before you got back,” Richie said, darting around the kitchen island to tackle Eddie in the doorway.

After they got back from Derry, Richie had decided to take a brief sabbatical from comedy. He hadn’t been happy with what he was doing, he told Eddie, and he wanted some time to get reacquainted with who he was as a person. 

Originally, they were just going to be friends, living in the same city and seeing each other on the weekends. But, after one notable Saturday night at the club down the street from Richie’s apartment, Eddie realized he was going to have to divorce his wife before any gay infidelity happened.

And then they were just going to be roommates, who may or may not hook up occasionally, but who had a strictly platonic relationship. That plan had only lasted three weeks.

And now it had been nearly a year of dating Richie, one of the happiest years of Eddie’s life. Richie had gotten really into cooking and home repair in his time off, the latter being much less successful than the primary.

But Eddie wasn’t sure he could remember Richie making something as delicious as whatever was on the stove tonight.

“At least I managed to finally get home, right? And Richie, that smells delicious,” Eddie said.

“I was super excited to test out this recipe. It’s a new saag paneer recipe that I’m already more hopeful about than the last one. I even made the paneer at home!”

“That’s actually super cool. You’ll have to tell me about it over dinner.” Eddie walked over to the cabinets, grabbing silverware and a few glasses. “Do you want to open that bottle of Cabernet we’ve been meaning to get to?”

Later that night they were sipping wine over empty plates. The food had been just as amazing as Eddie had hoped, and there was plenty to eat the next morning when they invariably decided to take a lazy Saturday. Eddie took a moment to look at Richie, to really look at him. He looked so much happier than he had the year before, much lighter. 

Richie slowly got up and put a record on. He insisted that all music sounded better that way, like the nerd he was. Slowly, Madonna’s Like a Virgin started playing. 

“Very romantic,” Eddie laughed.

“Really you don’t remember?” Richie feigned hurt.

“Wait, was this the song that was playing down at Tyler’s the first time we kissed?”

“It was,” Richie said, before slowly lowering onto his knee. “Eddie, my love, you are the best thing that ever happened to me.” Eddie couldn’t believe what was happening. Sure, they’d discussed getting married before, but Eddie was already planning to propose to Richie that Sunday. 

“Nope,” he said, jumping to the ground. “Will you, Richie Tozier, marry me?” Eddie pulled the ring me kept in his back pocket out.

“Yes, of course, but did you really have to be the one to propose?” Richie smiled and slid the ring onto his finger. He pulled Eddie in for a kiss. “Can I at least do this?”

“Of course.”

—

That night, Eddie and Richie were lying in bed with Eddie pressed against Richie’s chest. Both of them were on the edge of falling asleep.

“You know, Eddie, I’ve been thinking about getting back into comedy. What do you think?”

“I think that’s a great idea,” Eddie said. “Are you thinking about doing your old set again?”

“No, no, I was thinking about doing some new stuff, some of my own stuff. Start out small in little clubs, see what works and what doesn’t.”

“I’m excited to see it, although you know I’ll have to say it’s terrible.”

“I’d expect no less,” Richie said, letting out a little laugh. He paused and took a breath. “Although, I was thinking, I want to come out, you know, come out as gay before I go back.”

“Are you sure? That’s a big risk.”

“For this?” He fiddled with the ring Eddie had given him. “I think it’s worth it. Plus, I can always just fall back on having you pay for everything.”

“That’s a terrible plan. We couldn’t afford this apartment on my income alone in the long term while still saving a decent amount of money. But, if you want to come out, you definitely should. And Richie?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m proud of you and I love you.”

—

The next morning, at ten, @Trashmouth posted the following message to his Twitter. He did not consult his publicist.

_got engaged to my boyfriend last night everybody keep your eyes peeled for our clown themed horror wedding_

—

The fluorescent light bulbs flickered, buzzed and cracked. If he didn’t know better, Eddie would have sworn they were populated by a swarm of very angry bees.

It was only noon, and Richie had already sent him seven different sites for DIY wedding decorations. Eddie insisted that neither of them were good enough with arts and crafts to not waste the supplies, but Richie promised they could talk Stan into doing it.

Suddenly, a voice cut through Eddie’s thoughts. 

“Dude! Wild weekend,” so-and-so said as he whirled into Max’s desk. The greatest tragedy of Eddie’s day was that he was within earshot of everything that happened over there.

“What’d you do? Something lame?”

“No, man. Me, Ethan, and Cian went down to that bar on Fifth and got so hammered that we had to spend Saturday night in the drunk tank. Ethan even tried to pee on some guy's car.”

“Wild, dude,” Max said. Eddie tried to tune them out by reading Richie’s newest rambling text message, but they were just so loud. “Me and that chick from Tinder spent the weekend together, if you know what I mean.”

“Nice dude. I should probably get back to work before the boss gets all pissed at me again.” So-and-so yawned. “I can’t believe it’s only noon. I’m still so hungover from this weekend.”

“Wait, before you go, did you see that thing that comedian I liked posted? Trashmouth?” Eddie perked his head up. He knew he shouldn’t, but he wanted to know what they would say. 

“No, what has it?”

“He said he was gay, bro. Totally wild, man.”

“Totally. Would not have guessed. Anyway, see you at lunch,” so-and-so said. Eddie heard his footsteps walk towards his desk. That could have gone much worse, he thought.

—

“Hey, Max,” Eddie said, knocking on the wall of his cubicle.

“Yeah?”

“I’m supposed to tell you that you’re gonna take some of my files while I’m off next week. I’ve got the Duchavo files here,” he said, dropping a blue folder onto Max’s desk, “and I’m forwarding the others to you. If you have any questions, just email me.”

“Cool, dude.” Max picked up the file and inspected it. “Where are you going?”

“I’m getting married.” Eddie did not want to talk any more than necessary.

“That’s awesome man! Congrats! Where’s it gonna be?”

“Atlanta, at my friend’s house. He’s letting me and my fiancé use his place for free.”

“My sister actually lives in Atlanta. She just had her first daughter last month, she’s the cutest thing ever. Wait, do you want to see pictures?” Eddie did not, but Max looked so excited reaching for his bag.

“Sure, why not.”

Max proceeded to swipe through what seemed like hundreds of photos. Eddie had to admit she was kind of cute.

“Her name’s Helen Eileen, by the way.”

“She’s cute.” Eddie looked at his watch. “Oh, how time flies. I really should get going.”

—

Their wedding was amazing. It was small, just the Losers and Richie’s family. They’d set some tables out in Stan and Patty’s backyard and rented a stereo system and a floral arch. Stan has gotten a free ordainment online. Richie wore a polo and Eddie wore a bright orange Hawaiian shirt. It was, in a word, beautiful.

The next day, the Losers celebrated by doing an escape room as a group, narrowly getting out in fifty-five minutes. They followed it with Korean Barbeque and a trip to Purgatory at the Masquerade to see a metal band Stan was into.

At two in the morning, Richie and Eddie collapsed into Stan and Patty’s guest bed. 

“You know, back when we were kids, I carved our initials into the kissing bridge,” Richie said, turning to Eddie. 

“Really?”

“Yeah. I guess I’ve been waiting for this to happen for a long time now.”

“If it helps, I used to cover the tops of my assignments with doodles of our initials together in a heart. It got so bad that Ms. Avery made me stay after third period one day to talk to her about it.”

“God, how did we survive as long as we did?” Richie asked, smiling.

“Honestly? No idea. But at least we’re married now,” Eddie said.

“Yeah. I hope it keeps feeling as good as it does now.”

“I hope so too.”

“I love you, Eds.”

“I love you too, even if that’s not my name.”

—

It was time to plan the Office Christmas Party. Max had been put in charge because of course he had. Eddie was sure he’d had the same role in his high school’s Student Government. It seemed to fit.

“Now, everybody, I’m just trying to get a basic count of who all’s coming so I know how much stuff to buy. I’ll come around, and I just want you all to tell me if you’re coming and how many people you’re bringing. We’re gonna have a rocking party this year!” Max said, standing on top of a rickety stack of crates.

If only he brought that much enthusiasm to his work, Eddie thought, he might not have had to spend two weeks undoing Max’s one week of work. What a fun thing to do instead of a honeymoon.

“Eddie! You coming? I’d love to have you at the party, man,” Max said, clipboard clasped in his hand. 

“Yeah, I’ll be there.” Initially Eddie hadn't wanted to come, but Richie had talked him into it. Plus, Richie was sociable enough that he might make Eddie some work friends.

“Are you gonna bring your wife?”

“No, my husband’s coming,” Eddie said.

“Husband? Cool, didn’t know that.”

“I never mentioned him?”

“Guess not. Oh, any suggestions for the party?”

“Nope.”

“Cool. See you around!” Max called as he walked to the next cubicle.

—

“Dude!” Max yelled when Eddie walked into the break room. “You never told me you knew Richie Tozier!”

“Richie was here?”

“You’re on a first name basis with him? That’s totally rad. He let me take a photo with him, which was amazing. Have you seen his new stuff?” Max was smiling and pacing, rocking backwards and forwards on his heels.

“Obviously”

“It’s actually pretty good! I wasn’t expecting it, but I went to one of his shows at a club near my apartment, and it was pretty hilarious. The guy’s famous for a reason. Anyway, he left you this.” Max held out a crumpled paper bag. Eddie wondered who crumpled it, Richie or Max.

“Thanks.”

“I can’t believe you know Trashmouth! And I can’t believe he actually was at my office today!”

“Yeah, it’s pretty cool. I should probably go.” Eddie left as Max continued muttering to himself.

When he sat down and opened the bag, Eddie found a note from Richie and two brownies, his favorite dessert.

_To Eds-_

_I shouldn’t eat the whole pan by myself so I brought you these. Also, no offense, your lunch looked kind of sad today_

_Love, Richie_

—

The Holiday party was not, in fact, rocking. So-and-so and some of the interns had broken into the liquor early, and were now in various states of disarray in the corner. Louis from HR and started karaoke, and Millie, the coworker Eddie hated least, was doing a truly awful rendition of Girls Just Wanna Have Fun into the microphone. Max was running around showing people pictures of his niece. And, to make matters worse, Richie’s meeting with Netflix had run long and he wasn’t there yet. It was a good thing for Richie, Eddie knew, but that didn’t make the party any more bearable.

“Eddie! Have you seen these new pictures of Elly eating spaghetti? They’re so adorable,” Max said, a glass of eggnog held in his hand so tightly it looked like it could crack at a fly’s breath.

“Yeah, you showed me them on Wednesday.”

“All of them?”

“You made sure of that.”

“Wait, is your husband here yet? I could totally show him the pictures too.” Right at that moment Eddie got a text letting him know Richie was in the parking lot.

“He just got here, I’m going to go let him in.”

“Can I come?” Max asked.

Eddie sighed. “Sure.”

The two of them took the stairs down, with Max swaying uncomfortably forwards at times, to the point Eddie worried he might up and tip down.

Eventually they made it to the bottom, and Eddie heard a familiar voice. 

“Eds!” Richie shouted, barrelling towards them. 

“Trashmouth?” Max said in shock, his mouth hanging open. He straightened himself out and smoothed his shirt. “It’s an honor to meet you again.”

“Aren’t you going to show him your pictures?” Eddie asked.

“I don’t have to,” Max said, “it’s fine.”

“No, you should. He’ll appreciate them. He’s got a whole scale for rating babies.”

“It’s true. I call it the Buscemi to Not Buscemi scale, and I’ve even begun applying it to adults,” Richie piped in.

“I’m gonna, uh, leave,” Max said, suddenly seeming fully sober as he dashed to the stairs.

“That was weird,” Eddie said, “Max is usually a lot more outgoing than that.”

“Really? Because last time I saw him he awkwardly held his phone out and muttered ‘photo’.”

“Interesting and good to know.” Eddie stopped walking towards the stairs for a second. “Do we really need to go to the party? We could just head home and watch cheesy Hallmark rom coms. I mean, I don’t want to hear the rest of Millie’s karaoke.”

“There’s karaoke?” Richie adopted a devilish grin. “We’re definitely going then.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is the last short fic (other than one Better Call Saul fic I’ve been meaning to write for ages) before I begin my multi-chapter IT story (unless I decide to procrastinate by writing more short fics...)
> 
> I hope y’all like this, and I hope y’all all have a wonderful day!


End file.
